Why are lawyers so dang smart?(AP Photo/Jim Mone, File)

Evidently the dockets in Minnesota are less cramped than those in New York and California. On Monday, the players consolidated all of their lawsuits in the big MN.

The sides have not communicated since the talks fell apart and the players union disbanded Nov. 14.

Yet that hasn't stopped the suits from sniping at one another from afar, which of course does little but increase the rancor of the two sides (kind of the opposite of illustrating the hope for an agreement, no?)  The whole article from USA Today can be found here.  But here's a short summary along with some witty commentary:


Rick Buchanan, NBA Executive Vice President and General Counsel (Savagely):


"We assume that Mr. Boies was not happy with either the reassignment of the case from Oakland to San Francisco or the fact that the new judge scheduled the first conference for March 2012...This is consistent with Mr. Boies' inappropriate shopping for a forum that he can only hope will be friendlier to his baseless legal claims."

Ouch, Rick but you only sound like an angry man forced to do more paperwork.

David Boies

"Talking it through … we thought things would move faster in Minnesota. The docket is less congested there."

Do you all hear me? I want to resolve this-for the fans. Quickly!

And further:

"They've made pretty clear they (the league) have no interest in talking to us. … I thought this was a case we ought to try and resolve"

Can't we all just get along?

David Boies (Lawyer's humor)

 "One of the good things about lawsuits: I know I'm going to hear from them in about three weeks," (meaning the 21 days the league has to respond to the filing.)

Bahahaahahahahaha...Attaboy, Davie, yer killin' me over here!

And lastly, to prove that he and his clients are the good guys, check this one out:

"Eventually, people come to the realization that litigation is not the best way to resolve most disputes...Most disputes ought to be settled. Trying a lawsuit is fun to lawyers. It's our form of competition. But it's not good for the system. It's generally not good for client, if there's an alternative...This was the last resort for players."

Last resort for the players? Did they not have a chance to accept an offer before all of this?

And if you think there was a PR battle before, the one in which the object was to win the hearts and minds of us fans, just you wait, my friends. Mr. Boies is playing victim here, and if we aren't careful we could fall for it. It takes two to rumble, and Boies wins even if he loses. Anyone know his hourly rate?

Former Phoenix Suns forward and current emcee Cedric Ceballos suffered “a series of small heart attacks” on Sunday that has left him hospitalized in Phoenix, according to a release from...

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That’s the question we will all have to ponder if the NBA lockout wipes out the 2011-12 season and along with it the final year of Steve Nash’s Phoenix Suns contract. Ever since Amare...

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"We're trapped in the bottom of this 40 foot hole!"

"But at least we found the treasure!" 

The hinges creak as the lid of the treasure chest is forced open.  Gold, silver, and jewels spill out, overflowing the chest and gleaming in the torchlight.

"Oh my! This must be worth over 4 billion gold pieces!  We're rich beyond our wildest dreams!"

"All we have to do is climb up, lower a rope, tie it to the treasure chest, and pull it up, and we can live like kings for the rest of our days!"

"We're going to have to work together to get up without a rope.  If we stand back to back-- like this-- and link our elbows-- together, yeah, that's it-- we can climb up together.  Put one foot on the wall-- there.  Now I'll do the same."

"Yeah!  There we go!  Another foot, up! Unh. Yes, it's working!"

"Back to back, arm in arm, we can make it out of here!"

"Unh.  Keep climbing.  A little more.  Unh."

"Getting closer.  Then we can just lower my rope, haul it up, and split the 4 billion!"

"Yeah!  Unh. Who gets to keep the rope after we split everything?"

"Whaddya mean, 'Who gets to keep the rope?'  Unh. It's my rope.  I'll keep the rope."

"No way!  That's not fair!  What about the middle class?! We should cut it in two!"

"I'm keeping the rope!  And the padlock we busted off the chest, too!  Take it, or leave it!  And any lint I find in the lining of the chest!  OR THERE'S NO DEAL!"

"YEAH?!  Well, I have a bundle of dynamite here, and I'm lighting it right now--"

"Don't let go! Whadder you doing? We're gonna FALL!"

"--and dropping it down the hole, so you better change your nasty tone when you're talking to me, and give me--"


Both men fall in, the hole collapses, and they are totally buried, and no one ever remembers that they existed.

The End


* But, fortunately, a team of lawyers arrives and, after years and years of arguing about the correct length of shovel to use, and the proper dimensions of the scaffolding and support timbers, they rescue some of the gold, which they keep for themselves.  yippee. *


"My gift is to be able to make you listen, to get an emotion out of you, and to make you feel better, feel good inside. That’s me. I’m the happy music man. I’m the candy man." 

~Wayman Tisdale

We could use a happy music man right about now, couldn't we? NBATV's documentary "The Wayman Tisdale Story" recently aired, and it wasn't much about basketball. For a man who was a 3-time All-American, member of the National Collegiate Basketball Hall of Fame, and 2nd overall pick in the NBA draft who went on to play 12 seasons in the league, including 3 with the Suns, it's exceptional that the story is more about Tisdale the musician and Tisdale the man. He was an extremely talented basketball player, but that's only a small part of what made Wayman Tisdale an amazing person.


First, take a moment to look at the smile on Tisdale's face in this picture. I've seen countless pictures and videos of the man, and that beaming smile is always there, bringing his joy to share with the rest of us. That is a gift in itself, but it also presented a man who achieved success in basketball, music and life, and who never let life's setbacks take his smile away from him.

Tisdale was a phenomenal college basketball player. Making first-team All-American three times in three seasons is no small feat. His performance as a freshman at Oklahoma was so dominant that the outstanding freshman of the year in college basketball each year is given the Wayman Tisdale Award.

He was selected #2 overall in the 1985 draft by the Indiana Pacers, later traded to the Sacramento Kings, and signed as a free agent with the Suns in 1994. It can be said that Tisdale's pro basketball career was a disappointment (he was drafted ahead of Karl Malone and Joe Dumars), but basketball turned out not to be his true passion.

When Tisdale retired from the Suns in 1997 to pursue a music career, I admit that I was a bit skeptical. OK, yeah, an athlete wants to play around in music. Ah, but I was wrong. His musical aspirations were no lark at all, and Tisdale played bass and sang on eight studio albums, reaching #1 on the contemporary jazz charts with "Face to Face". The man could play.

That 2009 performance came after he was diagnosed with cancer and lost half of his right leg. He needed a little help walking, but he didn't need help to play bass, sing and thrill the crowd. Tisdale did this until his end.

To push through, the 6-foot-9 "gentle giant" recalled the challenges he faced during his basketball career. "I had some coaches that literally didn't want me to make it, and one in particular was [Team USA coach] Bobby Knight," Tisdale says. "At the time, I frowned on that … I look at it today that had I not persevered through a lot of the stuff he put me through, I probably wouldn't be here today. I thank God for that dude because he pushed me."

from Tisdale Reaches for His Biggest Rebound

"The average Joe comes in, thinks the world's over, they're all alone, disabled, etc.," Sabolich says. "Someone like Wayman goes through the same experience of losing the limb but he's such a stellar personality that this didn't faze him much. You ask him if he's OK and he says 'I'm fine, this is just a little roadblock.'"

Tisdale succumbed to cancer on May 15, 2009. His spirit has yet to give in. And that, more than his considerable talents at basketball and music, is his legacy. A world class athlete has his leg taken away, and he's still meeting the challenge with a smile.

The current NBA labor and Suns mediocrity situation is troubling. None of us can say definitively when either will be solved. But it will pass.

"I'm fine, this is just a little roadblock."

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